Bette drove home from Milk with a soaring heart, but aching loins. She still couldn’t believe that she had refrained from bringing Tina home with her. God…Tina had really wanted her! To see all that lust and love shining in Tina’s eyes, and to hear her whisper to her “I want you to taste me again…please baby,” had nearly brought Bette to her knees. However, she couldn’t help but feel proud of herself for having the restraint to say no…even if she was going to have to soak in a bath tub full ice water! Some things are more important than *****, and Tina being able to trust Bette’s motivations was one of them. It also wasn’t lost on Bette that she needed to be able to trust her own motivations as well.

Tonight, while she sat talking and laughing with Tina and their friends, she was once again pleasantly surprised by how much she liked Tina as a person. She knew that she was in love with Tina, but with being away from her all these months, it was so great to just enjoy being around her in a relaxed, fun atmosphere. Tina was not only kind and loving, and always gave of herself, but she was also extremely smart, very intuitive, was insatiably curious, funny, creative, ambitious, and was totally present with whomever she was talking to. It had always pissed Bette off when she thought someone was dismissing Tina because of her “girl next door” looks and her gentle disposition. That somehow because of these traits, she wasn’t as smart as, or as out there on the edge, as they were. What they didn’t take the time to see was that Tina was probably smarter than they were, and she could be as “LA” as anyone, she just did it in her own subtle way. Tina didn’t feel the need to shove herself down anyone’s throat, nor did she feel the need to stand out in a crowd. She was totally comfortable with who she was, and because of that, she did stand out without even trying. Bette had loved that about Tina, because Bette knew that she did have that need, to stand out, to be on “the edge of our culture,” just like she had described the Provocation’s exhibit. She had never quite been as comfortable with herself as Tina. She always felt the need, the desire to be more…do more. Being with Tina had really helped her to ease that somewhat, to be able to relax into herself. Unfortunately, the last couple of years Bette had found herself going back to her old ways, where she had always wanted…strove, to be the best of…
Candace had helped her with her control issues as well, but when Bette thought about it, she realized that with Candace, who was also controlling, she felt the need to reign in her aggressive personality. With Tina, she had wanted to be less controlling, less aggressive.

Bette wandered around the house, wanting to tell Tina what a great time she had tonight and how much she was looking forward to getting to know her all over again, but it was too late to call her…wasn’t it? Yes, they were all probably in bed by now, since they had to get up in the morning to take Tina to the airport. In fact, Bette thought she should be in bed as well, but she was to pumped up from the evening. Well,…since it’s too late to call her, and Tina wanted them to communicate by e-mail…tonight’s as good a time as any to start. So…Bette sat down at her computer and wrote to her friend Tina.

Hi T,

I had the most incredible time with my friends tonight…..



~ ~ ~


“I can’t believe that you’re going to be gone for another two months T,” Alice whined. “It has been so great having you home.” They were all gathered at the airport again, this time saying good-bye. Originally, it was just going to be Alice and Dana dropping Tina off, but when Bette asked to come, the whole gang had decided to go. Tina looked around at all her friends, and felt a happiness she hadn’t felt for a while. Unlike her homecoming, where Bette had been missing, today the complete family of friends were here.

“Don’t worry Al, it will go by fast. It’s summertime, you guys will be busy with BBQ’s and dinner parties, pool parties, beach parties, party parties! I’ll be back before you know it. Besides, I have to be back for sure on September 12th.”

“Why what happens on September 12th?”

Tina was facing Alice, but she looked directly into Bette’s eyes. “Because September 12th is 60 days from yesterday.”

Bette gulped, but kept her mouth shut. Never one to let a question go unasked, Alice took the bait. “Ok, what the ***** does that mean?”

Never taking her eyes off Bette, Tina smiled and said, “Well, let’s just say I have a legal contract that comes due on that day, and I need to be here to take care of it.” Bette could feel her knees weaken and blood rushing to her face. She knew she had a goofy grin on her face, but didn’t care…not one bit. The whole group looked from Tina to Bette, and then back to Tina, but since neither one of them said anything else, Alice just muttered, “Whatever gets you back here as soon as possible, is fine with me.”

“Ok Tina, I think you should probably get started. It’s busy in here today and you know it takes longer now, going through security.”

Tina smiled and hugged Kit. “You’re right. It’s time. Thank you Kit, for everything this week. It was great to see you again.” Tina lowered her voice so only Kit could hear her. “And thanks for playing that song last night.”

Kit hugged her back and said, “Baby girl, I will do anything I can to see my sister happy, and no mattered what has happened, you have to know…you are what makes her happy. So if I can do something to help convince you of that, then count me in.”

“Thanks Kit.” Tina took her time hugging everyone, whispering something to each one, making them all feel special, and loved by this woman. When she got to Bette, there was a slight hesitation before she reached up and pulled Bette in for a full body hug. They were touching from head to toe, neither woman wanting to let go. However, since they had an audience, Tina pulled away before anyone got uncomfortable. Bette didn’t let go all the way, still holding on to Tina’s upper arms. “I love you Tina. Let me know when you get to your apartment, so I know your safe.”

“I will Bette. I love you too.” Then ever so gently, Tina leaned in and kissed Bette. The kiss was soft and gentle, full of love and hope. Bette allowed Tina’s tongue to part her lips, savoring for just a moment the sweetness of her taste…but then pulled away, not only catch her breath, but to stop herself from doing something that might have embarrassed them both in front of their friends.

Alice, looking indignant, put her hands on her hips and said, “Hey, if you two are just friends, how come she gets tongue and we don’t?”

Dana glared at her girlfriend. “Al!!”

“Hey, I’m just saying we’re all Tina’s friends too, so how come Bette, who’s “just a friend,” gets tongue action, and I get a peck on the cheek, just like my mother kisses me?”

“Ok Al, pucker up!” Tina grabbed Alice and pretended like she was going to kiss her on the lips, but Alice pulled back covering her mouth. “Forget it T. You had your chance, it’s too late now. You’re just going to have to fly away, wondering what you could have had.”

Bette looked at Alice and folded her arms in front of her. “Well, I’ve had you…I mean it Al, so I’ll tell Tina about it later…ya know, so she won’t feel like she’s missing out on anything.”

“Very funny Porter.”

“Ok, ok…I gotta go you guys. Come here everyone…group hug!”


~ ~ ~


Four and a half hours later, Tina walked into her apartment and dropped her bags. She had called Bette from the cab on the way home to tell her she had arrived safe, but she wanted to send her a e-mail as well. Tina figured that since Bette wasn’t as keen on the whole e-mail thing, that she would be the first to send one. It always seems a bit easier to reply to a letter, rather than start one.

She logged onto her computer and decided to sift threw her incoming e-mails first. As her eyes were perusing down the list, an address jumped out at her. BPorterCAC@aol.com. Tina’s hand quickly came up and covered her mouth.

“Oh my God…she sent me a e-mail last night, after we left the bar.” Tina click the button to open the mail.


Hi T,

I had the most incredible time with my friends tonight…..



Tina’s eyes filled with tears as she read about the night before, told to her lovingly from Bette’s point of view. The end of the letter was signed,

Always,

Bette “Just a friend” Porter